Reduce Stress

Try the Absurd Response to Outrageous Requests

by David Granirer

According to an article I read, the way to combat stress is through the Relaxation Response. All you have to do is find a quiet, calm environment with no background noise, say a one-syllable mantra over and over, and sit or lie in a completely comfortable position after removing your shoes and loosening any tight-fitting clothing.

There’s just one problem. I have yet to find a workplace that provides this tranquil environment where I can loosen my clothes and chant a mantra without having coworkers think I’ve lost it.

There’s one more problem. Maybe the reasons are neurological or biological, but for some people, sitting quietly is a form of torture. For them, these types of one-size-fits-all stress management techniques are a setup for failure.

So for those of you fidgety, nervous types (and anyone else), here’s an alternative to the Relaxation Response. I call it the Absurd and Unacceptable Response. It takes about two minutes and works like this:

• Start by imagining the situation that’s stressing you out.
• Think of how you’re supposed to respond to it.
• Imagine yourself responding in the most absurd and  unacceptable way
• Play out this scenario in your mind and exaggerate it. If possible, share it with a sympathetic friend or coworker.

or example, let’s say your boss has given you some sort of ridiculous deadline that you can’t possibly meet. The right way to respond would be to politely ask for an extension, or to work around the clock. The absurd and unacceptable response would be to get down on your knees, loudly begging and pleading with him to change his mind, and perhaps threatening to throw yourself out the window if he doesn’t yield.

And as you visualize this scene, go for the worst case. See him refusing to bend, and imagine yourself hiring Tony Soprano and the boys to reason with him. And why stop there? While they’re at it, picture Tony and the boys negotiating you a handsome raise and an all-expense paid holiday to some tropical locale.

Obviously, you’re not going to actually do any of these things. But playing out this little vignette in your mind and maybe sharing it with someone else is a great way to get a laugh. When you feel powerless, laughing at your situation can help salvage some of your self-esteem. Though you can’t control the external situation, you are giving yourself some control over what happens internally.

It’s also a way of releasing some of your frustration, so that when you do end up working around the clock to meet that impossible deadline, your resentment may not be quite as high.

Is this a miracle cure–all? Will it dramatically change things? No. But it can help you cope a bit better, and maybe even have some fun while doing it.

David Granirer gives laughter in the workplace presentations, helping hundreds of organizations throughout North America reduce stress, increase wellness, and cope with change. For more information on his presentations, stand-up comedy, products, and articles call (604) 205-9242 or go to http://www.psychocomic.com